


.your shield, your weakness

by AkaToMidori



Series: Your Shield, Your Weakness [2]
Category: Arashi (Band)
Genre: AU, Angst, Drama, F/M, Genderswap, Genderswitched Aiba, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-26
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:54:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21976192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AkaToMidori/pseuds/AkaToMidori
Summary: When she was a little girl, Masami’s grandmother used to tell her that no one knows what they have until they’ve lost it.
Relationships: Aiba Masaki/Sakurai Sho
Series: Your Shield, Your Weakness [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1580965
Comments: 4
Kudos: 40
Collections: Sakuraiba Tanabata 2019-2020





	.your shield, your weakness

**Author's Note:**

> _Dec 26_  
>  Prompt: “You need to wake up because I can’t do this without you.”
> 
> Warning: genderswitched Aiba

When she was a little girl, Masami’s grandmother used to tell her that no one knows what they have until they’ve lost it. The problem was that she had always known what she had, but she had never been able to do anything about it. And now that she was about to lose him, she hated herself all the more for it.

Masami stared at her bodyguard lying on the hospital bed. The oxygen mask covered the lower half of his face, while his hair was flattened on his forehead, but that didn’t make him look any less handsome in her eyes. She brushed away his bangs gently, and sighed. The surgery had gone well and his wound was healing, but he had to be put under a coma by the doctors so he could recover. It had already been three days since that moment, but they didn’t know when or even – her throat closed at the thought – _if_ he would wake up. 

“You _need_ to wake up,” she said, pressing her face into the sheets. “You need to wake up, because I can’t do this without you.” 

Somebody cleared their throat to warn her of their presence. Masami’s head shot up, and she saw the head nurse, Ohno-san, quietly walk in. 

“I think it’s good that you talk to him,” Ohno-san said, smiling softly at her as he checked his patient’s vitals. “You know, there is no scientific proof of this, but I really do believe he can hear you.” He gave her a kind smile before going away. 

Masami nodded gratefully as tears welled up in her eyes again. She had done nothing but cry since Sho had been brought it, and she was tired of it. She felt so useless, just sitting there day and night, waiting for her bodyguard to wake up, so that she could finally, _finally_ tell him that she loved him, and always had since that first day she saw him all those years ago in high school. 

She could still remember watching Sho from a distance for a week before her best friend Nino had pushed her forward and made them crash into each other. Masami was ready to apologize when Sho stuttered his apology first, and only then did she notice that her bag had fallen on the ground. She couldn’t help but giggle happily when their hands brushed together over her maths notebook, relishing the sudden touch and the blush appearing on the other’s face. 

She had hoped to be friends with Sho first, and for a month or so they had started hanging out together at lunch, and sometimes even after school. Sho was smart, kind, and very funny in a dorky way that Masami really loved. She never knew why he had started pulling away all of a sudden, but she just guessed that he wasn’t that interested in being her friend, and she never had the courage to ask him about it or approach him ever again. 

Then, years later, her manager gave her a list of bodyguards to choose from to keep her safe from her stalker. When she saw his name on the list and a picture of him staring back at her from the page, his kind eyes still shining even in a photograph, she felt it was destiny. She had secretly hoped for Sho to remember her, but when they had met, he hadn’t given her any sign of recognition. So six months went by, and she still couldn’t work up the courage to confess her feelings to him, having to feel content just looking at him while he was looking away, hoping to catch him blush whenever their gazes met. 

Just to give herself something to do, she pressed down on the bed’s sheets to rid them of any wrinkles. She looked up at Sho’s peaceful face, and felt pain in her heart. She wanted nothing more than for his eyes to open up so she could get lost in them, for him to smile at her while looking away embarrassed when she caught him staring, for his plump lips to tighten shyly like they did after he just blurted out some silly joke or pun. And this time, she wouldn’t let him look away, she wouldn’t let him get flustered. 

“Just wake up,” she whispered, reaching out to hold his hand.

Her manager Jun had been bringing her meals for the past few days so that she could “ _avoid to ingest that horrendous hospital crap_ ,” as he so gently put it, and even got Nino to contribute. They would generally come once a day, bringing her a hot meal and offering her some company for a while. Masami knew that Jun and Nino were just looking for excuses to check in on her, and she was very grateful for it. 

Nino came in at midday like every day, his work uniform still on as usual. His hair was getting longer, and it kept poking his shirt’s collar, but he didn’t care. Nino would usually only get a haircut when HR would send him a reminder that the company policy expected ‘a certain level of grooming,’ and he would show up with a brand new cut the next day. Masami estimated that that day was bound to come soon. 

“No news about Romeo yet?” he said as greeting. 

Masami shook her head and grimaced. Nino had started calling Sho ‘Romeo’ from day one - sometimes, to Masami’s great embarrassment, even in front of the man himself. “The doctor said that his vitals are okay, and she was able to remove his oxygen mask. Now all that’s left is to wait for him to wake up.” 

Nino looked at her and handed her a lunchbox. “Here. It’s _mapo tofu_.” 

Masami smiled a bit despite herself. “You made it for me?” 

Nino shrugged nonchalantly. “It was easier than going to buy it. Also, J has been giving me an earful because,” he made air quotes, “ _‘always having fast food isn’t good for your health.’_ ” 

Masami giggled at that. “This reminds me how Sho-chan once tried to cook when I was sick. The food was all charred outside and frozen inside, so he had to order take-out. Jun came in an hour later with homemade food for us and looked at the Chinese boxes littering the living room with such contempt on his face.” She looked back at Sho’s figure on the bed and felt her heart clench. Nino was an excellent cook, but she would give anything to be able to eat Sho’s inedible food right now. 

Her best friend gave her shoulder a squeeze and they started eating in silence. 

  
  
  


Nino went away at one o’clock, his office shoes clacking away boringly out the door. Finding herself alone, Masami got out the last of her movie’s script from her backpack. After almost a week in the hospital, only going home to shower and change, Masami had started bringing some old scripts back with her to read them to Sho. During the last six months that he was appointed as her bodyguard, he would help her practice from time to time. She would run lines with him, and laugh wholeheartedly at his attempts at acting. With time, Sho had actually gotten better, especially when he was playing the antagonist, something that amused Masami to no end. 

“It’s like you have a hidden dark side,” she used to comment. 

She found cute how Sho would blush so furiously and pretend to be offended every time. 

She tracked down the dog ear she made and got back to the page she had been reading before her friend had come in. 

“You like this scene, Sho-chan, it’s the one where the spy Misa-san, aka yours truly, swoops with a gun and saves the day.” 

Masami cleared her voice and started reading. 

“Interior, the lab. Misa catches up with Professor Roman, who barricaded himself in and is ready to release his mass destruction virus. _‘I can’t let you do that.’_ That’s Misa, Sho-chan. _‘I won’t let you spread a disease just so you can make money off selling the cure.’_ The set for this scene was very creepy, I can still remember it. _‘And how do you think you can stop me, Misa-san?’_ That’s professor Roman, Sho-chan, do you remember how good you were at playing him? ‘ _The countdown has started and—’_

“ _‘The countdown has started, and I’m the only one who knows the code to stop it, so if I die the virus will still be spread, and no one will get a cure.’_ ” 

Masami’s wide eyes stared at the words in front of her, too afraid to look up. Sho’s voice, low and hoarse, had just recited professor Roman’s line perfectly, down to the last comma. Her hands slightly trembling, she put down her script and looked at the bed. There, looking tired but very much awake, was Sho, who was weakly trying to get up in a sitting position. 

“Sho-chan…” 

The bodyguard turned his head towards her, looking confused. “What happened, Aiba-san?” 

Masami stood up, the script falling at her feet with a thump. Without saying a word, she launched forward and caught the man’s lips with her own, feeling the tears streaming freely down her face. Sho stood still for a second, but then one of his hands came up to sit on her nape and push her gently into him as he started kissing her back with as much strength as he could. They didn’t know how long they spent like that, only parting when they found themselves gasping for air. 

Masami stepped away and looked down at the bed, noticing how Sho’s brow furrowed a bit. 

“What’s wrong? Does it hurt anywhere?” 

Sho shook his head. “You taste… spicy. I’m not saying it’s bad,” he added precipitously when he saw Masami’s shocked face. “Only unexpected.” 

Masami turned away, and a second later her giggles filled the room. She turned back to Sho and kissed him again, leaving small pecks on his full lips, all the while unable to stop giggling. Sho chuckled as well, and returned every small kiss with his own. 

“Yeah, I can get used to this,” he said, and he kissed her again.


End file.
